Posted on Recovered Memory Discussion Forum on December 11,1997.


I just came from a family meeting with a therapist that is treating another family member for 'recovered memory...sexual abuse".

The victim (34 yr old Female)is known by all in the family, to have a long history of embellishing the facts when she wants to prove a point or make a statement especially when she's angry...and she's angry.

We know her very well! She is our daughter. I am not the suspected abuser, however.

The meeting with the therapist was very disappointing. She is obviously and ardent supporter of 'recovered memory'. In her opening statement she said, " I'm convinced that she was sexually abused....the fact that she married her husband is proof of it. (Her husband was ahot stud and she was a lonely college student away from home)

When I asked her if her patient told her that this was a recently recovered memory, she replied, yes..that the patient said she just had a sudden flashback (2 months ago) and it came to her.

However, the patient told my wife last week that she had told her husband about the incidents over 10 years ago!

When I brought this tidbit out for the therapist, she just said, "That's ok. She knew about and remembered the incidents since adolescence, but the flashback was a "recovery of memory of her FEELINGS about it and the resulting trauma."

Unbelievable...Have they no shame. This person is suicidal going in to the Christmas holidays and this therapist (MSW)continues to have her read stories of survivors that she can relate to to help her better remember her feelings and discover how to deal with them.

Have you ever heard of a case like this? She remembers everything, but only recently rembered the 'horrible feelings associated with it'.

These tramatic incidents were incidents when she explored her sexuality with her brother. My understanding was that there was no penetration, just fondling and expermentations, mostly initiated by the patient ...not the alleged abuser.

Is 'playing doctor' and sibling exploration considered abuse? Do you have any information about studies done in this area?

Should an MSW being treating an active suicidal person...are they qualified?

Recovered Memory Discussion Forum Re: Courage to Sue

Sunday, 07-Dec-97

commenter writes:

I stood up at my computer and cheered! I just loved the way you reversed the BS I've been enduring for six years. My wife (the Abused) filed for divorce and acused me of abusing our daughter. Now she lives alone in resentment since my teenaged children all chose to live with me. All abusers were former victims. Is there a connection? ...a good father

Posted on Recovered Memory Forum on Dec 21, 1997 What do you call therapy which is killing its patients?

commenter answers:
I call it horrendous, horrible, heinous -- masquerading as theraputic.

Justice in Nebraska Friday, 20-Mar-98

"I am writing in response to your request for expunction of report(s) on the Nebraska Child Abuse and Neglect Central Register pertaining to you. Department staff have reviewed the case file. It has been determined that the reports(s) will be expunged from the Central register effective February 2, 1998..."

It had taken nine months of my life and left me with a profound sadness that I could have ever have been accused of sexually abusing the six year old daughter I loved. In a world where one could fall under the weight of such an injust accusation., I came to expect little in the way of the the ultimate prevalence of truth. It was the resources and support I found here that helped me prevail and perhaps educate those who are charged with protecting children in this state.

It was with mixed emotion that I received this letter today from the state of Nebraska exonerating me and removing my name from the central registry. It has been at great emotional cost, and it will continue to have its affect on our family life for a long time to come.

What is healing for me is by no means an indication of my daughter's well being. She remains a victim, not of sexual abuse, but of a toxic therapist who encouraged her recalled memories and devastated a family.

For prayers and support during this time, I want to thank you.
We rejoice with you at your good news! hallelujah!